Godly Friendships: Encouraging One Another
“The emphasis on establishing Godly friendships and community was a welcome challenge, and I jumped right in even though it was intimidating.”
Naomi Walker
Proverbs 27:17 - “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”
A recent study ranked Washington D.C. as the loneliest city in the United States. The raging epidemic of loneliness is not easily escapable, and this statistic is alarming. In a world that seeks to divide and isolate, it is more important than ever that we establish and surround ourselves with life-giving, Godly friends who encourage us to become more like Christ while offering love and accountability in every season.
Growing up, establishing good, God-fearing friendships was easy for me. Blame it on forced proximity, a Christian private school education, or both, but up until I graduated from college, I was surrounded by great groups of friends who loved God and constantly called me to a higher standard of living. I never had to think about what it would look like to not have this influence in my life. But then I moved to DC.
I moved to DC knowing about three people. And I did what any normal person would do, I connected with them as soon as I arrived. I was eager to find friends of any sort, with no thought to whether they followed Christ; I only wanted friends. I didn’t care how they lived their life or what they did to fill their time; I just craved the security of having people surround me, and I found some.
I found people to hang out with and do life with, but something was missing. When I was with these people, I felt fundamentally empty. I would get home after spending time with them and feel lonelier than I ever had before. One night, it finally all came to a head, and I cried out to God in frustration and confusion over how this could be.
I felt a tug in my spirit to take a hard look at the people I surrounded myself with and ask the question, “Do these so-called friends bring me life? Do they encourage me to live in a Christ-like manner? Do they see me, love me, or care for me?” And the short answer was no, they didn’t. Something had to change, and if my experience taught me anything, it was that a church was a good place to start looking for some Godly friends.
After a scroll through Instagram and a quick visit to the website, I found myself at Union City Church on a random Sunday during the winter of 2021. Immediately, I knew that there was something different about this place. From the moment I walked in I felt seen, loved, and cared for; everything I hadn’t felt when I surrounded myself with the wrong types of friends.
The emphasis on establishing Godly friendships and community was a welcome challenge, and I jumped right in even though it was intimidating. I joined a serve team. I joined a community group. I did everything I could to meet new people with the hopes I could make Godly friends. I had to be the one to take that first step, but once I did, I got more than I could have ever asked for.
God placed the most incredible people into my life who met me where I was, listened to what I was going through, and committed to being the friend that God has called us all to be. They saw past my mistakes and spoke life into me. They encouraged me to live a life worthy of the calling Christ has on me and held me accountable when I acted in ways that weren’t reflective of that call. They operated in a Christ-like love that corrects but doesn’t condemn, extends grace, not shame, and shows compassion, not indifference. I saw what a friend who reflected Christ looked like, and committed, through Christ’s strength alone, to become a life-giving, Godly friend.
Since that season, God has transformed my life and helped me to become the friend I so desperately needed at that moment, and was blessed enough to find within this Union City Sisterhood. By surrounding myself with faith-filled women of God, I have been able to grow in ways I never thought possible. They continue to encourage me, correct me, hold me accountable, and love me, and by doing so, they’ve sharpened me, so we now can sharpen each other, just as Proverbs 27:17 says.
You may be like me three and a half years ago looking for Godly friendships. First off, I am so glad you have committed to surrounding yourself with people who can speak life into you and point you toward Christ. My encouragement to you is to get plugged into your church. Sometimes all it takes is that first, kind of scary, but always necessary, a step towards Christian community. Whether that be through asking a woman you meet in church for coffee or joining a serve team or community group, take that step and see what God will do with your faithfulness.
If you already find yourself surrounded by a group of Godly, faith-filled friends, my encouragement to you is to:
1. Go to these friends and ask them, “What can I do to be a better friend? How can I partner with you in prayer?” Also, go to God and seek his counsel on how you can operate in his love and be a friend who sharpens another.
2. Look and see if there are women in this church or your life who need a Godly friend to come alongside them and be the type of friend God has called us to be. You never know who is simply waiting for someone to say hello and make that first connection.
